Dispatch: A life of horses and waves

About three weeks ago, I woke up to the email below. It was actually sent to a friend of mine who then forwarded it to me. I’ve changed all the actual names in order to respect the private lives of these people. Doing that certainly takes some of the weight of this fabulous life changing epic of a story. Nonetheless, it’s still a brightly lit tale of wonder and hope at how ones life can change into magnificent forms if given the chance. It is entirely true by the way, this is not fiction. Ole!

yes, darling Susan, life does take very strange turns and mine is one which i would never in a million years have imagined. where to begin? well, i suppose it all evolved rather unexpectedly when Jack Thomas the beverage tycoon came knocking at the miller house and offered to buy it for any amount i wanted. at the time i had absolutely no desire to leave the house but somehow he ended up living there and i followed roberto the eternal surfer down here to baja where we´ve had a vacation house since the mid 70’s…the thought of living in a desert by the sea never appealed to me but as i had sold the house i decided i could use this place as a base and travel which i did for several years after leaving LA . all was well until one day i woke up with a strong need to get a horse which i found and purchased that same day. i figured the horse would be an anchor and something i could relate to in this rather arid wasteland. i prefer balmy tropical beaches to windswept ones…the horse did engage me and gave this place a much more romantic perspective. i would saddle up and roam the humble back country where people lived biblical lives tucked away in the hills…all was idyllic until a very out of season rain drizzled three days in a row , not a heavy rain but enough to make arroyos which had been dry for fifty years run steady, carrying large branches, bushes etc down and eventually blocking narrow passages. the force of the dammed waters when they finally burst came powerfully, wrenching hundred year old trees and carrying everything in its path down to the sea. my horse included…i cannot begin to describe the agony , the loss and the remorse i felt, for i had had a premonition , difficult to explain in regards to the beautiful spot where i kept my horse but had not acted on it. the day before the rains came i opted to leave him against my inner feeling of moving him to another place…that was the beginning of my demise. i felt so much remorse i spent months combing the wasteland looking for this fanthom horse. i put adds and posters for reward and i went everywhere that people told me they had seen such a horse. eventually i gave up and moved to new york..naj and peter were staying in a magnificent loft which jackie sanders was selling and i was just about to put an offer when roberto called me from here telling me he thought someone had found my horse. i stupidly flew back and that is where it all went wrong , or rather my life took a completely different path, a path i never envisioned in my wildest dreams, one which has caused me to abandon all i thought was me, caused bittersweet joy and sorrow, broken heart beyond repair and a complete renewal of life priorities. ..for seven years i lived in total isolation, no electricity, no phone no connection with the outside world in this place called todos santos which was until a few years ago the perfect spot to ride a wild horse along a 60 mile span of wild coastline. it turned out that the horse which i came back to was a wild beast and demon which i rejected at first sight. however, as life would have it, i was destined to meet the greatest foe and challenge of my life and i took him on with fear and trepidation for it was this very horse who destoyed my life and gave me what i had always been afraid to claim, my own natural power… the last decade has been a lesson of patience, perseverance, returning to the dust. through this initial horse connection i have since fostered a herd of twenty spirited and noble wild beings which are teaching me what i needed to learn but was impossible to do within human relations. i had to choose between a life of comfort, a husband and a life of uncertainty and complete surrender to responsibility of dozens of horses dogs and different species which have come to further instruct me in the joy of living dangerously with an open heart…this may sound a bit pretentious , vague and predictable, just a romantic excuse for menopausal syndrome. whatever it is, dear Susan, here i am in a most unlikely place, living a most unlikely life, one which i can´t even pretend to like but knowing that this is what i am meant to be doing right now and perversely enjoying it… this is a very scant sketch of what i have been up to since i left LA ..and you? i get news of sightings of you here there and everywhere. our grapevine reaches me now and then, specially now that i have returned to the world via internet. this is magical!. i remember when Tommy was describing and championing all this. i though it science fictional… what a strange turn indeed! you remain one of the most memorable events of my life. i too think of you often and those wonderful special times are vivrant in my heart. i love you, most elegant and generous lady. Que viva la vida!!